Green Dragon Bowmen



A friendly club of archers of all ages and abilities
Recurve, Barebow, Compound and Long Bow

 

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Fun Stuff
 

The shooting line is a place for intense concentration. Propelling an arrow all that distance into such a small gold ring is not something that can be done if you're distracted. There can be no reason to chat on the shooting line. Heaven forbid that anyone should actually make someone else laugh while they're at full draw.

Please send any contributions towards the 'fun stuff' to I.T Officer 
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** IMPORTANT MESSAGE
FOR MEMBERS **

Please be reminded that you MUST carry your Green Dragon membership card and display it on your quiver and display your car badge at all times when you visit the shooting field. Knebworth Estates staff will now check these regularly. Also remember that access for archery members is limited to the huts, the shooting field, and the toilets. We do not have open access to the park itself.
 

Green Dragon Bowmen is a member of ontarget, Archery GB’s Club Development Programme. Clubs joining ontarget are making a public pledge to be open and friendly, to advance archery and to proactively work with Archery GB and in return clubs will be recognised, rewarded and given support, guidance and advice to develop and improve.

 

 

Here are some new jokes from Dave Stock

 A guy is talking to his wife and tells her that he has been told that their milkman has had sex with every woman in their street, bar one. His wife then says “I bet that’s that stuck-up snobby woman at No 34!”

A guy driving his car gets stopped by the police. They ask him to get out of his car and blow into a breathalyser. “No way, I can’t do that” he says. “Why not?” asks the officer. “I’m an asthmatic, here is my card.” “Ah ok, best we go to the Police Station then.” Upon arrival, the guy is asked to provide a urine sample. “Sorry I can’t do that, I’m having kidney dialyses, here is my card.” “OK, no problem, we can take a sample of your blood” said the officer. “No way! I’m a haemophiliac, here is my card.” “Right I have had enough of this. See that straight white-line over there? I want you to walk along it in both directions. Do it now!” “Sorry officer there is no way I can do that” said the guy. “Why on earth not?” asks the officer. “Because I’m pissed!!”

A woman goes to see a Medium and asks to get in touch with her dead husband. After a short time the Medium says that she has made contact with the guy. “Fantastic” says the woman. “Ask in how he is”. The Medium says “He is fine, no problem.”  “Ask him if he is happy.” “Yes he says that he is very happy indeed.” The woman is a little surprised by this and asks the Medium to find out how he spends his time. “Ah well, he says he gets up early, has breakfast followed by 2 hours of non-stop sex then a nap. He wakes for a light lunch followed by another 2 hours of non-stop sex and another nap. When he wakes again, he has an evening meal followed by 2 hours of non-stop sex…” “STOP! I have heard enough!” cries the woman. “Ask him why he wasn’t like that with me when he was alive.” The Medium replies “Ah, he says he wasn’t a Rabbit then.”   

One of the Green Dragon Bowmen was looking a bit perplexed at the shoot last week so I asked him what was wrong. (You know me, all heart!) He told me that he had a family problem that had been on his mind for some time. I asked if I could be of any help. He then said “OK, can you tell me why my sister has 2 brothers but I have only got 1?”  Not the sharpest arrow in the quiver!

A
guy chops off his manhood while doing some DIY stuff at home. A specialist tells him not to despair because there is some good news: due to major advances in surgical techniques it can be replaced but it does cost money as it can only be done privately. He is then told he can have a regular one for £2000, a large one for £4000 or an XL one for £10,000. His face lights up, he gets very excited and tells the specialist that he will get a loan and go for the XL one. “Hold on sir, you really must discuss this with your wife, reach a decision and then come back to me.” So in due course the guy returns to see the specialist. “So, have you discussed this with your wife and reached a decision?” “Yes, we are going to have a new fitted kitchen!”